I once stopped traffic to remove a (what-I-thought-was) dead snake from the road.
When I was 11, my then cat,Spooky, caught two small field mice and left them on our porch as a “gift”. I frantically searched the house for some sort of medical item to fix them. I came up with medical tape and a gauze patch. I taped the gauze patch around their wound and slowly waited to see if that would restore them to their lively health. I watched as their small, teeny-tiny stomachs slowly stopped moving.
In the summer months when Jason and I leave the door open way into the evening, I spend a good portion of my time trying to get the bugs that came in back out.
I allow extra running time on rainy days because I know there will be worms on the greenway that need saving.
When Sophie started going outside, she became an excellent bird-hunter (much to my dismay). Though I never scolded her for it – it’s her nature to do this! – I totally and completely hated it. Especially when she would sneak a dead bird by me and into our house to play with! That I would not allow. Jason and I buried these birds on the side of the house under our hydrangea bush.
I once found a wounded mourning dove at work and took it home with me in a shoebox to see if I had the right medicine for it. That bird is also part of our bird cemetary.
My college career has been confusing (to me, never to the Lord) at times. When I began the Biology program, I felt led there. I felt like I had a calling to go into it and come out with a science degree so that I can work with animals. A few months ago I tried to change this. In having a hard time with school and making a few bad grades, I decided that I was going to switch to the BA program instead.
“It’s easier. I will get done faster. Maybe I can become a teacher with it? Or, I’ve always loved Nutrition, maybe I’ll become an R.D.” These are the things I told myself. And the plan was set. Forget my calling! Getting there is just too hard, I’d rather take the easy way thankyouverymuch. So I began planning and contacting Winthrop about their Nutrition program…setting up meetings, thanking God that I wouldn’t have to go on to Organic Chem II. Less labs! Hooray!
Then one day I’m sitting in Biology and my friend is talking about an internship opening at the Raptor Center. And I swear to you, my heart dropped, I felt such a strong urge and conviction from the Holy Spirit there was no denying it. And then the Lord gave me one word: Go.
That’s when I began an arguement with God. “But I don’t want to do that! It’s too hard and I’m not smart enough! I’ve already planned on getting back into Nutrition after this. God, I don’t want to go through that program!” Have you ever argued with God? Well, you aren’t going to win. That night I went home and cried to Jason, telling him the whole story and how I’d never felt any conviction like I had right then.
Your calling is not something you can deny about yourself.
Does I seem like a weirdo to the person sitting in traffic that I’ve stopped just to move a dead snake? Sure.
Did my mom think I was crazy for bringing mice into the house? More-so, did she think I was crazy for trying to save them? You bet.
But that doesn’t matter to God. From the time I was that little girl staring at a garden snake kept in a mason jar at my uncles house, till the traffic-stopping woman I am today- God has been preparing me for something.
He’s put these qualities in me. There is no denying them. I’ve felt like he’s got something great planned for me. That’s he’s going to us me in a great way. And greatness is only measured by Him, not by this world. Therefore, it can be defined in many ways…in ways that don’t fit our definition of “to be great”.
This past week, I’ve had more of a peace in my heart about my grades in Chemistry. Our veterinarian told me that he took it and failed the first time. Other students have told me that it’s the hardest class at the university. But God tells me “You won’t even remember this obstacle once you see the great things I’ve prepared for you.” .
So I’m choosing to believe Him. I believe that He’ll make a path for me to get to the calling that I’m supposed to fulfill. I believe that He’s going to use me. I believe Him when He tells me not to be ashamed of my tender heart.
I’m going to be keep being “weird”. I will keep trying to save and help animals that are suffering. I will keep feeding and pouring into this passion of mine because it is God-given.
I will keep believing Him for greater things that I cannot yet see.